Tag Archives: Music

Vote for Profecy! (And a life update…I’m still ALIVE!)

Bonsoir and Hello to all of my friends and readers!

It has been some time since I last wrote a post and I have missed my little “Sunny Place”. School is going just as well as it can. Projects are wrapping up as the semester winds down to finality. With only four more weeks until Finals, I have very little time to actually work, so I will be very busy the closer my deadlines approach.

In the meantime, I have also acquired a new job! Success!

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While this will make my busy schedule even busier, I welcome the opportunity because I have been without a job for ten months. That’s almost a year!

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That’s ten months with no income (I mean, yes, yes, I’ve had the occasional side job and odd job, but not a real, actual job), no place to go except home and school, and so on. For these past ten months, I did not realize it until I started my job, but I was very bored. In all honesty, I really did miss working.

Oh! What is my job, you ask? I work at a local tavern now as a waitress/hostess/cashier. While I’ve been cross-trained in those three positions, my main job is a waitress. The best part is I got really good hours on Friday and Saturday evenings. Those are money-making tip hours! Yay!

I hope I do well…. (I really am a good, hard worker and a fast learner but I have a tendency to second-guess myself when I first start out because I really want to do a great job.)

On to another topic!

My youngest brother is part of an all-male A Cappella group, named Profecy, at University and recently they entered a music video contest hosted by Lady Gaga to promote awareness to end sexual assaults on college campuses with the “It’s On Us” campaign. Here is their music video:

It’s hauntingly beautiful. You can vote for them HERE!

I can’t make you vote for them, but please, if you can, please do. Vote for Rowan’s Profecy A Cappella!

– Soleil

Who am I?

Despite my last post and efforts, I have become addicted to Bollywood movies. Recently, I watched one called Ek Main Aur Ekk Tu and the opening song sort of struck on a chord. View the song here, courtesy of a YouTube upload.

The lyrics follow as:
As are the days, so are the nights, everything looks loose…
Even the sky looks a little less blue…
Life, sometimes,
Is a little full, is sometimes empty,
I know my name, but I don’t know who I am…
I know where my home is, but I don’t know who I am…
Who am I, who…
As are the days, so are the nights,
Everything looks loose…
Even the sky looks a little less blue…
Looks loose…

The lyrics I’ve made bold are the ones I found relatable. I’m not sure why but they really stuck to me, made me contemplate some things about myself.

I feel like, in today’s world, it is easy to get lost, swept up in the fast-pace of things and wrapped up in stuff that would otherwise be unnecessary.

Becoming lost is the easy part.

Finding who you are is the journey.

I do know my name and I do know where my home is, but if you asked me who I was, I would give you the generic response: “I am an art major trying to graduate and someday I’d like to be a Disney artist”, whereas the real, truthful answer is: “I don’t know who I am. I’m still looking.”

I know that I am studying art at university but I often wonder if it is the proper path. When I sit and muse over my life so far, the choices I have made, the studies I have engaged in, I begin to doubt that I have chosen correctly.

And that scares me.

Let’s go over facts: I am twenty-five and still live at home with my parents and siblings. I currently have no proper career that can give me the guarantee or safety of any kind of insurance and I’m studying for a degree that will give me access to a slim array of positions once I do graduate this upcoming Fall semester. The probability that I will land a successful and albeit decent art career are slim to none. Certainly, I will not get something that can offer me the insurance I so desperately need, nor the pay scale to even consider trying to live on my own, let alone survive.

That terrifies me.

It’s a big jump, from scared to terrified, you know, and when these dark and foreboding thoughts do worm their way back up from where I’ve tried to bury them away in the deepest corners of my mind, I feel even more lost than I normally do.

And that makes me stop and think and wonder: “What can I do?”, “What can I accomplish?”

But I have no answers.

It’s practically the same feeling as being stuck, of feeling stagnant and unmoving in my life (which I covered in a previous post here).

To be honest, my life is rather boring. I’m not an exceptionally exciting person. I live in an extremely rural area (as I have mentioned before) where the nearest shopping is at least a half hour drive, and even the options offered are minimal. The more you want, the farther away you have to drive.

I’d rather stay home than go out.

I have two friends within easy travel distance but our schedules keep us apart. My other friends live, spread across the wide world and we can only communicate through messages.

My biggest entertainment is my own wild imagination, where I can live the exciting life I am always dreaming about, and I make no efforts to turn my imagination into reality. That is my failing. And that is my triumph.

I am still learning, still discovering who I am and what makes me, what drives me, what limits me, what makes me soar.

But I am still lost and my journey is still ongoing.

So the big question is put simply, but the answer is seemingly impossible and limitless: “Who am I?”

Recapping Before The Road Trip!

So, I’ve been very distracted with “DuckTales” as of late. Really, I’m watching it right now when I should be writing for my practice month of NaNoWriMo. I’m a bad writer, sometimes. Not in the sense that my writing is bad (of course, that’s just my own personal opinion. I like to hope it’s not bad), but that I slack off when I really shouldn’t be. It’s just…sometimes my brain needs a break from the imaginary world I have created and I need to do other things.

Tomorrow, I leave for Florida. It will be a 14 hour drive. I leave with Kels and her brother, Marty. Really, I’m a bit nervous about the long ride because it will be my first long road trip without my parents or a family member (but if you look at our family tree, Kels and Marty are actually related to me and my family by marriage and we’re like 4th cousins, once removed, or something like that). It’s a far stretch, though.

I am very excited, though, that I get to see Jaren! My very best friend! He’s even letting us stay at his apartment, yay! (If you remember, Jaren is the first boy I fell in love with and was mentioned in this post: Love: A Seemingly Impossible Quest). I cannot wait to spend the next four days with him! We’re going to the beach, Downtown Disney, having a BBQ, ah it all sounds so wonderful!

Oh, then my audition at Disney World is Monday. I practiced the 16 bars of “Cockeyed Optimist” that I will be singing singing today with a piano accompaniment. Really, I don’t care if I don’t get the part of Dory for the Finding Nemo: The Musical, but I just really, really want a part! I don’t care if I’m one of the coral actors. Just let me be in this show, please!

Also, I have a new favorite song: Uma Thurman by Fall Out Boy.

Look for my words again soon!

-Soleil